STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Anon E Mouse]

Two prawns were swimming around in the sea one day. The first one was called Justin and the second one was called Kristian.
They were continually being chased and threatened by the sharks that inhabited the area.

Eventually Justin had had enough. He said to Kristian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have to worry about being eaten all the time."

As he said this, a large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted!"

And believe it or not, with that Justin turned into a fearsome shark.

Kristian was horrified and so immediately swam away as he was scared of being eaten by his old friend.

As time went by, Justin found his new life as a shark to be boring and lonely. None of his old friends would let him get near them as they thought he would eat them and so they just swam away whenever he approached.

It took a while, but eventually Justin realized that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

Then one day he was swimming all alone as usual when he saw the mysterious cod again. He thought it'd be better if he could go back to his old life so he swam to the cod and begged to be changed back. The cod worked his magic and suddenly Justin was a prawn once more.

With tears of joy streaming down his cheeks Justin swam straight to Kristian's home.

As he opened the coral gate, the happy memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "Kristian, it's me, Justin, your old friend. Come out and see me again."

Kristian replied, "No way! You're a shark now and you'll just eat me. I'm not being tricked into being your dinner."

Justin shouted back "No, I'm not a shark any more. That was the old me. I've changed...

I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Kristian."

[Richard Petty]

Two prawns were swimming around in the sea one day. The first one was called Justin and the second one was called Kristian.
They were continually being chased and threatened by the sharks that inhabited the area.

Eventually Justin had had enough. He said to Kristian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have to worry about being eaten all the time."

As he said this, a large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted!"

And believe it or not, with that Justin turned into a fearsome shark.

Kristian was horrified and so immediately swam away as he was scared of being eaten by his old friend.

As time went by, Justin found his new life as a shark to be boring and lonely. None of his old friends would let him get near them as they thought he would eat them and so they just swam away whenever he approached.

It took a while, but eventually Justin realized that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

Then one day he was swimming all alone as usual when he saw the mysterious cod again. He thought it'd be better if he could go back to his old life so he swam to the cod and begged to be changed back. The cod worked his magic and suddenly Justin was a prawn once more.

With tears of joy streaming down his cheeks Justin swam straight to Kristian's home.

As he opened the coral gate, the happy memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "Kristian, it's me, Justin, your old friend. Come out and see me again."

Kristian replied, "No way! You're a shark now and you'll just eat me. I'm not being tricked into being your dinner."

Justin shouted back "No, I'm not a shark any more. That was the old me. I've changed...

I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Kristian."

[Fuggletim]

I was at a music festival and one of the bands were so bad, they started doing requests. When they asked me what I would like them to play next, I told them “Snakes and Ladders please!”

[beechcroft]

Two Cowboys were told for evey Indian scalp ,they will be paid 10 Dollars. after going nearly all day without any luck, they come across one Indian obviously lost, and take his scalp, They settle down for the nite in their Tent, one of them gets up to stretch out when he sees 1000 Indians armed to the teeth in the distance... ' wake up Jake he says.. wake up' ! wer'e going to be millionaires !!!

[Fuggletim]

Won my first cage fight today! The budgie was hopeless.

[WTF]

Breaking News!

The FA have turned down a multi million pound advertising offer from a dog food company.

An FA spokesman said "Having the Winalot logo on the shirts is just unrealistic and simply taking the piss...."

[Fuggletim]

I entered the World Kleptomania Championship” and took the bronze, silver and gold medals………

[Chalkie]

So three tortoises, Mick, Andy and Roy, decide to go on a picnic. Mick packs the picnic basket with beer and sandwiches. The trouble is that the picnic site is ten miles away so; it takes them ten days to get there. When they get there Mick unpacks the food and beer.
'Ok Roy give me the bottle opener' 'I didn't bring it' says Roy ' I thought you packed it' Mick gets worried, He turns to Andy, 'Did you bring the bottle opener'
Naturally Andy didn't bring it. So they're stuck ten miles from home without a bottle opener. Mick and Andy beg Roy to go back for it.
But he refuses as he says they will eat all the sandwiches. After two hours, and after they have sworn on their tortoise lives that they will not eat the sandwiches, he finally agrees.
So Roy sets off down the road at a steady pace. 20 days pass and he still isn't back and Mick and Andy are starving, but a promise is a promise. Another 5 days and he still isn't back, but a promise is a promise. Finally they can't take it any longer so they take out a sandwich each, and just as they are about to eat it, Roy pops up from behind a rock and shouts
'I KNEW IT'......I'M NOT GOING!'

[Fuggletim]

After much consideration, myself and my other half decided we didn’t want to have children.

They seemed a bit upset when we left them at the station….

[Anon E Mouse]

I thought my wife was joking when she said she wanted to go to a Monkee's concert in Switzerland.

Then I saw her face, now I'm in Geneva!

[Richard Petty]

I thought my wife was joking when she said she wanted to go to a Monkee's concert in Switzerland.

Then I saw her face, now I'm in Geneva!

That is so terrible yet actually very funny

[beechcroft]

Wife in hospital in a coma, consultant say's to husband, 'we have just completed a 2 year study, and think we have come up with a solution that could wake up your wife after 6 months in this coma, All you have to do is give oraL sex and she will snap out of the coma straight away ' Ok say's husband,ill give it a try, ' so he goes into the room and 5 minutes later comes out and say's ' but doc. she keeps choking !!

[Fuggletim]

I saw Michael J Fox and Christopher Lloyd in Badshot Lea Garden Centre today! At least I think it was them, but their backs were to the fuchsias……..

[Anon E Mouse]

I had lunch at a Mary Poppins theme restaurant today…

Super cauliflower cheese but the lobster was atrocious..

[Anon E Mouse]

I saw Michael J Fox and Christopher Lloyd in Badshot Lea Garden Centre today! At least I think it was them, but their backs were to the fuchsias……..