STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

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beechcroft
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by beechcroft »

I think the wife is leaving me....she has asked for the house keeping money in travellers cheques
beechcroft
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by beechcroft »

The wife said i have a few days off, so i'm going to put a map of the uk on the back of the kitchen door, and i'm going to throw an arrow at it, where ever it lands, thats where we are going.......looks like where going to the 'back of the fridge '
Fuggletim
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim »

God had originally designed Wasps to be the main pollinating inset, but in the end he went for Option B………
Gone West
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Gone West »

My local vicar wanted to earn a bit of extra money so went for a job as an ice cream seller. He didn’t get the job because he couldn’t do sundaes.
Anon E Mouse
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse »

Jesus Christ was originally going to be named Gary until Mary stubbed her toe.
Richard Petty
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Richard Petty »

Anon E Mouse wrote: Thu May 09, 2024 11:23 am Jesus Christ was originally going to be named Gary until Mary stubbed her toe.
That's one of your very good ones :lol:
The old saying goes "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all the people all the time." In fact sometimes it seems impossible to even please some of the people any of the time
Richard Petty
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Richard Petty »

Yesterday at the club we were trying to deter pigeons from settling in the stands and we were saying that often playing the sound of Eagles can frighten them away.

So I played Hotel California on my phone.


PS: I actually did that, and I think the other volunteers wanted to throw something at me :lol:
The old saying goes "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all the people all the time." In fact sometimes it seems impossible to even please some of the people any of the time
Fuggletim
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim »

My Daughter was going to call our new Grandson “Miles”, but we realised someone might shorten it to “Kilometres”………
Anon E Mouse
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse »

My son came home from school today and said

"dad I've failed biology at school".

" I'm your mum". I replied.
Chalkie
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Chalkie »

My wife has just started going through the change.....Bless her.

It's going to be really weird calling her John...
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy ****....What a ride!"
Anon E Mouse
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse »

Meanwhile in Ireland a chap has discovered the oldest person to have ever lived.
He took reporters to a very small headstone that read :-
193
Miles from Dublin.
Fuggletim
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Fuggletim »

I got stopped by Customs at Heathrow and they seized the box of ceramic cups I had! They said I was smuggling……….
Anon E Mouse
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse »

The man who invented throat lozenges died last week.

There was no coffin at the funeral.
Chalkie
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Chalkie »

When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "Congrats!".

But none of them come and touch the man's Penis and say "Well done!".

Moral: Hard work is never appreciated: Only results matter.
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy ****....What a ride!"
Anon E Mouse
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Re: Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Post by Anon E Mouse »

The fact that there is a Highway to Hell but only a Stairway to Heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers

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