STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Richard Petty]

There was a fire drill at IKEA yesterday…

We all assembled in the car park!

[Richard Petty]

Just been to my local hospital and I saw a sign saying "Warning pickpockets operate here"...

Surely it would be safer to leave it to the Surgeons?

[Fuggletim]

I found some kittens at the side of the road in a suitcase, so I called the RSPCA.

They asked me were they moving when I found them?

I said I think they were and that would explain the suitcase……

[Chalkie]

My wife asked if she could have a little peace and quite whilst she cooked dinner.............

So I took the battery out of the smoke alarm!

[Fuggletim]

The Fire Service today issued their report on the devastating fire at the scissor factory where it was obvious that corners had been cut in fire precautions.

[frimley_greener]

I wish the makers of Avocado would put a new toy in....
I have fifty wooden balls already.....

[Fuggletim]

People seem to be able to identify themself as anything nowadays! I was talking to someone who thinks they are a piece of Samsonite luggage. They really are a strange case….

[beechcroft]

Man visits his brother in the lunatic Asylum and asks him whats he going to be when he gets out ''well said his brother, iv'e been studying law , so i might become a barrister,or a judge or even a solicitor, ..but there again i might continue being a teapot !

[beechcroft]

Had a vasectomy last year, didn't work, just changes the colour of your kids

[Shots1954]

Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road?"
"Because roads hadn't been invented in those days".....

[Fuggletim]

My Solicitor got married to another Solicitor. Neither said “I do” but both said they “Accept the terms and conditions,”

[beechcroft]

Paddy goes into the chemist and asks 'what is the strongest thing you have for a headache '? Chemist say's 'nothing beats Annadin '
Ok say's Paddy, i'll have a pack of nothing

[Fuggletim]

I was going as a Shepherd to a fancy dress party, but the costume shop was rubbish. Just can’t get the staff…..

[Anon E Mouse]

My Dad was telling me he bought his 1st car from the Krays.
I said what reg ?
He said no Ronnie I think.

[Anon E Mouse]

I threw a ball for my dog...

It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a Tuxedo.