STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Fri Oct 07, 2022 10:27 pm

I was on a train and this woman opposite looked at me and said “Every time you smile, I feel like inviting you to my place...”

I asked “Are you single??”

She replied “No, I’m a dentist.”

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 9:08 am

I’ve just found out that they won’t be making 12” rulers any longer...

Richard Petty · Post by **Richard Petty** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 11:12 am

I was walking down the road this morning and first got hit by a violin then a clarinet and then a piano...

I think it's an orchestrated attack!

Richard Petty · Post by **Richard Petty** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 11:13 am

I went on a date with a girl who said she loved animals.

I said, "I work with animals every day."

She said, "That's so sweet. What do you do?"

I replied, "I' work in an Abattoir"

We never went on a second date!

Richard Petty · Post by **Richard Petty** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 11:15 am

I had to go to the A&E last night. I told the doctor that every time I cough, it sounds like I'm saying words like knight, bishop, pawn and queen…

He said, "You've got a chess infection!"

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 12:07 pm

I went into the bookshop and asked the woman for a book about turtles.
She asked: "Hardback?" and I replied "Yeah, and little heads."

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 12:08 pm

My old school teacher was called Miss Turtle.. She tortoise all well

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Sat Oct 08, 2022 12:09 pm

My pet turtle is good at sport - it’s a terrapin bowling champion!

Fuggletim · Post by **Fuggletim** » Sun Oct 09, 2022 3:02 pm

I found a load of fried noodles in bed this morning. I must have been sleepwoking again…..

Dr Jim Royle · Post by **Dr Jim Royle** » Mon Oct 10, 2022 10:41 am

POLICE NOTICE - Thieves who stole 3 ton of Tarmac have now been lying low now for 2 months.

A spokesman for the police said "we expect them to resurface soon"

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Tue Oct 11, 2022 12:23 pm

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit walked into a clinic to donate blood. The doctor says to the rabbit: "What's your blood type?"

"I'm probably a Type O", the rabbit replied with great sadness

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Tue Oct 11, 2022 7:54 pm

Dung beetle walks into a bar and says “Is this stool taken ?”

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Thu Oct 13, 2022 7:59 am

I was going to post a carpentry pun but I couldn’t find any that woodwork…

Fuggletim · Post by **Fuggletim** » Thu Oct 13, 2022 9:45 pm

If anyone wants to go and see a Punch & Judy show without puppets, can I see a show of hands?

Anon E Mouse · Post by **Anon E Mouse** » Sat Oct 15, 2022 8:58 am

Apparently Kwasi Kwarteng had trouble getting a seat on the plane back to the UK because nobody wanted him anywhere near business or economy!

ShotsWeb

STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

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