ShotsWeb

What do Gingers miss most at a great party....the invitation

My boss rang me this morning and said where are you "I'm on the train heading to the south coast now." I replied "What?" he answered, sounding a bit annoyed. "Your supposed to be in the office this morning! What are you doing on a train?" "Well" I said, "...

I could donate one !!

5 ants rented an apartment with another 5 ants.....now they're tenants

My Doctor told me i had a heathly Prostate..I was deeply touched

Anon E Mouse wrote: ↑Thu Mar 23, 2023 10:37 pm The fella in our local chippy says the best way to cook fish is to give it a good slap first.

Sounds like codswallop to me?

If your ready to settle down, don't date a football player....there's only a 1/11 chance they're a keeper !

Anon E Mouse wrote: ↑Tue Feb 21, 2023 6:06 pm Opened my car bonnet this morning and found a bat sitting on the engine.
He said 'hello sir, how are you today, my you look very hansome today and are very nicely dressed'

I could see the problem straight away.

Bat flattery

nice.........

What does a deaf gynaecologist do ? he reads lips.

What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman ?......you can't unscrew a pregnant woman..

A dwarf was kicked out of a nudist colony.......He kept sticking his nose in everyone's business !

Went into my local book store.. they had a third off all titles.....so i bought The Lion The Witch..

Speach Impediment........There's a new support group for the London area call........D.DD.D.DD.D.DD Dave on 02082415411

What do you get if you cross human DNA with goat DNA ?........Banned from the zoo...

Richard Petty wrote: ↑Fri Nov 11, 2022 5:46 pm Yoko Ono is going into the jungle to advise the contestants on bush tucker survival techniques...

She's an expert as she's managed to live off one Beatle for over 40 years!

Not bad that !