STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Richard Petty]

Always borrow money from a pessimist. They’ll never expect it back.

[Richard Petty]

The problem isn’t that obesity runs in my family. It’s that no one runs in my family

[Anon E Mouse]

Most parents only drink on days that begin with T: Tuesday, Thursday …

… Today, Tomorrow, Thaturday, and Thunday.

[Anon E Mouse]

Scientists have discovered that the first two people on earth were Cockneys…

Well would you Adam and Eve it!

[Richard Petty]

Scientists have discovered that the first two people on earth were Cockneys…

Well would you Adam and Eve it!

[Dr Jim Royle]

If interested in booking my new company, Royle’s Firing Squad, let me know.

We aim to please.

[Anon E Mouse]

You know you are old when you clean to the music you used to drink to

[Anon E Mouse]

You know you're getting old, when you're at an antiques auction and 3 people bid on you!

[Shot through (& throu]

You know you are old when you can remember when Aldershot used to compete at the top end of the table.

[Anon E Mouse]

How many exotic birds can change a lightbulb?

Toucan.

[Anon E Mouse]

Today marks 100 days sober.

Obviously not in a row or anything silly like that, but in total!

[Anon E Mouse]

My wife just yelled at me, “You jerk, you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!?!”

What a strange way to start a conversation.

[Richard Petty]

Why did Adele cross the road?

To say hello from the other side.

[Richard Petty]

My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.

[Richard Petty]

What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? Tequila mockingbird.