STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Fuggletim]

With apologies to Anon:

I bought a mouse mat today so I hope the little sod wipes his feet on it when he comes in now’

[Chalkie]

Two women on a bus fighting bitterly over the last available seat.

The conductor had already tried unsuccessfully to intervene, when the bus driver shouted to the conductor,
"Let the ugly one take the seat"

Both woman stood for the rest of the journey.

[RedanRoadshot]

My Dad has an allotment, for the last 5 mornings, he’s arrived at the allotment to see that someone had laid a thin layer of soil on to the land. He reported it to the council, they setup CCTV, nothing showed up , but additional soil had been added. The plot thickens.

[Fuggletim]

After that thunderstorm last night, I checked my phone to see what would happen today. Sure enough there was a lightning symbol! Then I realised it was still charging……

[Anon E Mouse]

Looking forward to this years John Lewis Christmas advert which will just be a family huddled around a burning Christmas tree for warmth as they cook the family cat on a spit and a piano version of Things Can Only Get Better!

[Fuggletim]

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? Well, in hindsight I really should have thought about that when I bought the Needles Lighthouse…..

[Chalkie]

I had an out-of-body experience.

I was beside myself.

[Fuggletim]

Greta Thunberg was asked if we are any closer to a solution for climate change? She said “No; but we are getting warmer….”

[Richard Petty]

Greta Thunberg was asked if we are any closer to a solution for climate change? She said “No; but we are getting warmer….”

[Fuggletim]

Actually Greta Thunberg does do her real bit for climate change when it comes to electricity generation, as a lot of people turn off the TV when she appears…….

[Anon E Mouse]

I saw a horse in a wild west show that glowed in the dark once. Think he was rodeo active.

[Anon E Mouse]

I failed my biology exam.

The question was, 'Name something commonly found in cells.'

Apparently, 'scousers' isn't the right answer!

[Anon E Mouse]

A little boy was walking on the road eating a chocolate.

A man came over and said, "Son, eating chocolates is bad for your health."

The boy replied, "Do you know, my Grandpa lived to be 105 years old."

"By eating chocolates?" the man asked.

"No, by minding his own business!"

[Fuggletim]

My other half has been saying she wants to cover me with caramel, chocolate and biscuits! I think she has Domanatwix tendency……

[Anon E Mouse]

Why did the elf turn his phone to silent? He was bored of the rings