STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Richard Petty]

Don’t you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.

[Richard Petty]

It takes a lot of balls to play golf the way I do.

[Richard Petty]

Russian dolls are just so full of themselves.

[Richard Petty]

The problem isn’t that obesity runs in my family. It’s that no one runs in my family.

[Fuggletim]

What do you call a sad green vegetable? A Meloncauliflower.......

[Anon E Mouse]

A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark…

So in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist!

[Chalkie]

Filled the escort up with diesel last night.

She died.

[Anon E Mouse]

Breaking News:-

A woman who stole £10,000 worth of Botox from a surgery she worked in, for her personal use, was sentenced to one month in prison today.

Apparently, she showed no emotion in court.

[Fuggletim]

I went to Rome and it took me ages to to find my way out. The road system has some really strange quirks!

[Anon E Mouse]

I went to Drs about my hearing. He said describe the symptoms.
I said Homer is fat & bald, Marge has blue hair and they have 3 kids.

[Chalkie]

I've always wanted 3 kids.
Now I've got 2, I only want 1.

[bordon shot]

Three men clearly very drunk climb into a taxi and instruct the driver to get a move on.
The driver fires up the engine,lets it tick over for 5 minutes then switches off and says that will be £20 please.
The first drunk hands over £20 and gets out.
The second drunk hands over £5,says thank you and gets out.
The third drunk punches the driver on the nose and gets out.
Why did you do that enquire his companions.
The third drunk says that ******** maniac could have killed us all driving at that speed.

[WTF]

Did you know that before crowbars were invented most crows just sat at home and drank?

[WTF]

My Doctor has just informed me they have found a cure for my dyslexia.

That's music to my arse!

[WTF]

What did the horse say when it collapsed?

Sorry Ive fallen and can't giddyup........